Dear old friend
I received your letter today and oh! How my heart did ache I am troubled so bad I don't know what to do I am sorry you feel as you do about things. (or me) What did I ever do to make you love me? Or you just talking surely you don't care as much as you say you do. And besides you need nat care so much far there is plenty as good as me and much better looking. I could nat sleep from 1:30 this am if I had known as much then as now I guess I would have stayed awake all night. I am sorry you did nat sleep Friday night I did nat either but did S. night far the first night in nearly 3 years. I am almost and will be if I don't get relief soon . what I can now what do you want me to do? Please tell me everything you want me to anything that will relieve my mind oh it nearly kills me to think that I am causing trouble I want to bring joy instead of sorrow tell me what I can do that will bring joy to you? I did nat tell you why I am going to Ala.. I have to uncles out there and they said if I would go they would send me money to pay my way and also give me a home if I did nat stay on here so you see I am nat farsaking you far anather man and if it would be any
Consalation I will tell you there is " no other man" you are as dear to me as any other one. Does that help your feelings any? You said when I go, you are going, Please don't far people will say we are together if we are 1000 miles apart. If I go I will come back sometime " if I don't find anather man" and I don't guess I will far I am soon going to be grey headed and wrinkled faced and nobody will nat love me then. I don't know how I will get anather letter to you far we must nat let E. know anything more he got mad about Smith and he says people are asking him about you and me so we must quit letting him know anything you can depend on mother far she knows and can keep it. I do wish you would by her cow if you can use her a trade if you can it troubles me to see her in trouble. She is troubling awful about you and me. I am sorry she knows but I never had a secret from her. I can always depend on mother and she will tell you I never caused her any trouble. No girl never had a better mother and she knows what it means to love in vain. And I do too. Now you said you was better than you were 2 mo. Ago mabey you will be all right in a few mo. More oh please don't drink quit doing bad and live right you can never hope far happiness as long as you do as you do. You don't know what may happen if you would live far god and try to help lead a last world to jesus. You said nat to cry about you all, all the way you can keep me from it is to live right, and the thought that I am to blame far your wrong doing will shorten my days and make what I have unhappy. What did S. say about me I am scared about him I do wish he would get back right with me but I am afraid he wont. Oh! Why was I ever harmed anyway? I have caused nathing but trouble it looks like but god knows my heart and I want to do the right thing always. Now folks are going to talk about you being at mothers. They will say it was arranged befarehand and nathing we might say would nat change it. C.A. watches you every time I think to see if you stop there. At night you are passing you could put the letter in the box and I will get it. Say cant you drop it in the office at cummings and no one will be the wiser I will get it ok . I wish I could see you and you was free to talk and there was no one watching I would love far you to tell me everything you feel like telling me.
Have you seen C. H. yet? Say can you get him to cut their percent if I can get a compromise? They are men and can make more money and I cant. But I want you to get out of this someway befare I go crazy or die one. I thank you far every kind thing you have done far me far I believe I know why you do it. I am about out of paper and I better quit. Please live right I am praying far you. By. By. As ever A______
I will right some more as it may be a long time befare you get anather one.
I sleep some
last night nat much though. My thumb is in bad shape this a.m. what is to become of me I
dont know but god will take care of me. Mark is going to G. will send this by him. I wish I could see you but cant any more now I do want you to live right think of your four little
boys what will ever become of them with such example as you are setting far them do you
think about it far you will have to answer far it remember the bible says they that sow to
the flesh will of the flesh reap corruption so be careful. I am nat well at all do wish I could get out of trouble and will someday ( when I die). Be good and you will have more
pleasure. You are killing yourself drinking candidate whiskey do please quit.
as ever Abaline